Well it's my MIL's 60th Bday today. And for those who have been following the saga, the surgery went well today. Took double the time they said almost and she appears to be doing ok from what I saw. We will not know for another week or so if the lymphs are clear. But they did see some to take them and have checked.
It was a very long and stressful day. I'm glad its over. I finally had my breakdown too. I got in my van at the hospital and went to turn the key and the tears just fell. I cried it out and felt better and then drove home. I was alone at that point and I think it final hit me. I can't begin to tell you how much that woman means to me. I love her as my own mother. I love her as a dear friend. I just want this gone from her body and to never return. But I know life doesn't always give you what you want. If it did, things would be totally different.